We had our first fight. She wanted to talk to an ex. Email, phone or even visit him. I obviously didn't think it would be an ok idea. I think at this point we could have worked something out. But I was feeling jealous, and insecure, and she was feeling that I was trying to control her and take over her life. At that point it could have been resolved. We could have taken it to a third party. Her pastor, or a friend. We could have said lets think about how to handle it and decide what to do later, when our emotions cool down. This is why when we are emotional we should never make big decisions. Because we can't think when we are emotional, at least we can't think straight. (This is why the girls say about clothing, "WHAT was she THINKING when she bought THAT!" and why we pay too much for automobiles). But the argument was not about "we" it was about MY feelings and HER independence.

It is amazing that 24 hours before, we were in heaven. Things couldn't have been better! It WAS an absolute dream come true. So what happens when it comes crashing down like that? Why does it happen? How can it? It is because of our nature. The laws of physics say that things tend to go into disorder. It is true everywhere, from my room, to relationships, to supermodels. You can try botox, or surgery, but in the end we will all grow old, and fall apart. Things come to an end. It is inevitable. Relationships can be fixed, but lots of times people stay in them for the kids, or comfort or just being afraid of being alone. What is the point of it all? I guess this is why I believe in God. It would all be meaningless without God. With God there can be healing, there is a reason things happen, and you draw closer. I know it can happen without God, but it feels so much more special when He is the reason.

Anyhow, we managed to patch things up. When you have a clear conscience, the slightest wrong will disturb you. But it is crucial to listen to that conscience. We did listen and things are like new again. We just said sorry, and each of us yielded to the other. The trick is to put each other ahead of ourselves. So scary yet so effective. It needs a lot of trust.

The joy of Reconciliation is one of the most wonderful human emotions. To be apart and away, and then to come back just fills one with joy. I feel that way now, after that argument, just to know that we are back where we were before. There is a hint of heaviness, knowing how things rapidly disintegrated. We thought this was something amazing, yet, if so, why did it disappear so fast? I guess it didn't, we just had a moment of separation. But things are fine now.

Just don't ask me what will happen to that ex. But this is only my view, I guess there are other views to hear, especially hers.