The Senator

I work at a pharmacy, and in mid-August, one of our senators came in for a prescription. He is Senator Chris Dodd, the senior senator from Connecticut for about 20 years. He was on his way back from Groton CT, where they had announced that the submarine base had been spared from defense department cuts (link to his site). I was walking back to the pharmacy, and immediately noticed him. Prior to that I noticed some people walking in the aisles in a somewhat confused manner. The senator was with an aide, a younger man who didn't say much--just kept checking his palm pilot. Senator Dodd has very white hair and his face was flushed, a slight reddish complexion. He wasn't smiling and wasn't serious either. He seemed like a person who was used to giving orders and getting what he wanted when he wanted it.

He walked up to the pharmacy and asked for a prescription to be filled. Yet, he didn't have the doctor's prescription, so he called up the doctor and had the doctor call in the prescription to the pharmacist. By the time the doctor got through to the pharmacist, the senator had done some shopping and put his basket on the counter (of course, he was in the wrong spot--the pharmacist consultation area). I had to take down his information. He didn't have his insurance card, but he pulled out a bunch of credit cards and kind of threw them on the counter. Not out of arrogance, but I feel out of ignorance. He is truly out of touch with the common man, after spending about 20 years in Washington. Which is understandable. Although at the time, he came across as being arrogant. But now, I feel he was out of his environment. Kind of like me in India. :-)

The Senator did not know his zip code in Connecticut. He did know his address and phone number. His aide didn't know the zip code either. Mr. Dodd seemed irritated that I had to ask him all those question, but hey, rules are rules, if you let them slide for one person, the other person may take it as discrimination. He then sat down and was flipping through a People magazine. Meanwhile his aide was trying to get a certain cold sore medication (Abreva)off the hook. But it had a security tag and was locked on the wall. He actually yanked the metal holder (with all the Abrevas on it), off the wall. It took a while but we finally got him his prescription. While the senator was waiting, there was a French customer there, and the Senator started thanking her for her vote. She told him she was French and didn't vote. But he thanked her anyway, and was very kind and nice to her. I thought it was because he was a Democrat, and they love the French. To be fair, that customer is a really nice woman. In any case, one of the other female pharmacy technicians, said that the Senator was hitting on the girl.

Why do I find this so interesting? Why do people all over the world have this fascination with celebrities? I am pretty well read, and know what is going on in Washington, but I was starstruck. I couldn't say a word to him, not a compliment nor a criticism. In any case, he has done a decent job in the Senate, although I disagree with many of his policies. And I will never vote for him, and never have. I think we are fascinated with the private lives of celebrities, we want to know what they are really like. Many of them change and are different, but some are the same and stay the same. I think a good measure of character is what are we like when we are alone, our thoughts are minds, where do they roam? Are we acting the way we are thinking? You are what you eat. To me that means that what we consume is what is in us and finally what we display and show to those we come in contact with. By your fruits you will be known.

Jan Vilcek and Remicade

Jan Vilcek, the person who helped discover Remicade, is giving $105 million to NYU Medical School.

Lock your doors?

Recently I have been reading My Utmost for His Highest, a daily devotional by Oswald Chambers. It is short and quick to read daily, yet gives deep insight into spiritual life.

Today I read The Holy Suffering of the Saint.

Choosing to suffer means that there must be something wrong with you, but choosing God’s will— even if it means you will suffer— is something very different.

That brings up the question, are we choosing the will of God, and as a consequence, are we suffering? Or are we suffering out of our own choice?

My sister and kids are over the house. Her kids used to love me, and they did. But after a few days of staying in our home, they started saying things. Calling me a liar, saying my room stinks, things like that. They are only kids--not even teenagers, but of course, it does hurt when you know people don't like you. So I just decided not to talk to them and to ignore them.

I started thinking, what happened, what did I do? I haven't done anything different with them, I tease them and play with them, but nothing different from before. Then I remembered my sister's comments to me, about why I was ignorant about certain bills my parents paid. And about my Vonage phone, whose is it? I also realized that they are answering my phone. So I have come to the conclusion, that they are talking about me, pretty viciously, and the girls are listening to them, and that is why they don't like me anymore. It is probably my mom and my older sister that is doing the talking. I also noticed that my parents are making their plans for retirement, and my dad is asking my sisters about what they should do. But they do not include me at all in their plans.

It is clear that they think I have betrayed them. By not marrying the person that they choose, at this particular moment. I remember last Thanksgiving, we went to my elder sister's house. I told them, please don't talk about my marriage and about my girl, leave these things out. Well, right after Thanksgiving dinner, they started attacking me. They all said I was wrong to disobey my parents, and that I was acting in emotion and all kinds of things. My sister said that because I am disobeying my parents, my kids will do the same thing. And all about how American marriages end in divorce. I told them, if you want to talk one-on-one, I am willing, otherwise, I will leave. So..they didn't stop, they kept attacking me, so I just got up and left and drove home.

With that experience in my mind, I am really being careful. Now that they are talking about me, and making these veiled comments. Let me digress here, I hate the way Indians make these hints in order to get a point across. They don't want to be rude and be direct, so they say things in a roundabout way. I remember one of my aunts didn't like my mom for some reason, and after my brother's marriage, everyone was praising the marriage and saying good things (like you should). And she said, "The food didn't sit with me right, did anyone else get an upset stomach from the food?" This was her way of saying, "I don't like you people, but I can't say that so I will complain!" So this is the same thing that my elder sister is doing. And my mom has done for over a year towards me. She complains about my church, my friends, and on and on...

So I am avoiding my family members. Some of them are just not saying anything and others are most likely talking about me. If they want me to move out, or help with the bills, or whatever, I wish they would say it. But I don't have to go through another experience like last Thanksgiving. Is it an accident that shortly after that, I started having the reactivation of my Crohn's disease?

So this was supposed to be about suffering. I am suffering. The question is, am I suffering because I am doing God's Will? I think the reason all this is happening is because I have found a woman who loves the Lord. And I want to marry her, and my parents don't. I truly believe that she is the one that God wants me to marry, and my pastor at church agrees.

It is so hard, not to be angry and hateful towards my sister, and, I hate to admit it, but even her kids. So I will keep my mouth shut, and pray that my heart will change towards them. If my heart changes, I won't have to worry about my actions, they will take care of themselves.

So in the middle of all this, my door locks stopped working on my car. This is a 257,000 mile Toyota Camry Wagon. :-) First the driver door wouldn't unlock, then just a few days ago, the passenger door wouldn't unlock. So I had to open the wagon and crawl through to unlock the doors. I was thinking of getting a remote/keyless entry mechanism, or perhaps getting a locksmith, or installing new locks completely. Obviously, I don't have the money to do lots of that. And my obsessive-compulsive tendencies won't allow me to leave my doors unlocked (as my girlfriend suggested, such a simple solution!!!). So after hearing my sister's kids accuse me of breaking their doll (which I didn't do!), and then call me "liar." Again, I didn't lie, God is my witness. I put some lube on the key and played with the lock. And then the lock worked, and I tried it on the driver's door, and that worked as well. Honestly, It just lifted my spirits. Thank you Jesus, for making something go right in my life, even if it is such a small thing.

Been a while...

We are doing ok...my exam is getting closer. Just waiting for my performance to peak, so I can schedule it. I am getting in the groove. Feeling confident, thank God for that.

I read this blog by hitting the "next blog" button on the top right of the page. This girl was suicidal--at least she says she was. Who knows what to believe, especially on the Internet. So I had to put something down, I couldn't just leave without giving some hope. So I mentioned a verse and gave some advice. What exactly do you say to someone that is trying to kill themselves? Anything except, "Do it!" Change their mind, by talking them out of it. I say, try to get them to remember good things about their lives or perhaps, think of the future. I came across this quote:

a big part of willpower is having something to aspire to, something to live for--Mark Shuttleworth

It is strange that many non-Christians have elements of truth in their sayings and lives. There was another quote by an Indian guru:

You see many stars in the sky at night, but not when the sun rises. Can you therefore say that there are no stars in the heavens during the day? Because you cannot find God in the days of your ignorance, say not that there is no God.
--Ramakrishna Paramahamsa

What an eloquent argument for God. Imagine how much this man had searched for God. At the very least, he saw the fallacies of Hinduism. I am glad, though, that I put a Bible verse for that suicidal girl. Even though I don't have faith, and think that some of these other words may have a bigger impact. I know that the Holy Spirit can use those words to move and change lives. I need to ask forgiveness for my lack of faith. I think the girl is still alive--she posted again. She should know that there is hope (obviously not in her boyfriend) and that hope is in Christ.