Still in Love

She wanted to take a break. Still. I finally agreed. I was angry.
She was criticizing me and upset and complaining about me. I said,
"Fine, you want to take a break? Well go ahead!" I even gave her
permission to go and find other men, I told her to go and see what
else is out there. We were laying the ground rules, and I could
clearly see that she wasn't willing. So I said, "forget it." Up to
that point I was willing to do it mutually. But when I saw that she
wasn't willing, I thought, why should we force ourselves to do
something that we both don't want to do. Why should we force
ourselves to do something that God doesn't want us to do? So we
decided not to take the break.

I am different. More forceful and more determined. I just think that
no one understands the issue like I do. Perhaps my sisters do. That
is all. I know the issue and everyone who is giving "counsel" doesn't
have a clue. They don't. I am not saying that what they say is not
helpful. But they need to see the root of the problem. What I plan
on doing is talking to several people who know my family. And take
counsel from them. Because the whole thing is based on my family.
Second thing is that I want to be confident in the will of God. If I
stand firm, perhaps that is not wrong. I really don't know, but from
what I see it is God's will. I am just not sure how to handle it.
Time will tell if I made the right decision, but it is clear she can't
live without me. (I can't live without her, but I will never admit
it!). I have to take care of her, and I need her in my life. I will
fight for her, and protect her.

Finally, it is clear that she loves me. That is the honest fact and
the truth. That is the basis, and there is really no problem with our
relationship. So why should we take a break?